Baconsale

We’re Baconsale and we’re criminal masterminds. Well…maybe we are. We’re not quite certain, actually. But we are certain that Disney just released a film adaptation of Artemis Fowl, and we’re going to review it. None of us have read the book series, so we watched this movie without any expectations. We have a lot to say about it now. And even if you haven’t seen it, you can still listen to the first part of this review, which is spoiler free. In fact, we recommend listening to this episode before you watch it.

Dame Judi Dench’s gravely voice commands that you press play.

Surfin’ may be the only life, the only way for some, but for the three landlocked members of Baconsale, The Beach Boys was their closest connection to catchin’ waves, cool cars, and sunny beaches. So on this episode, we’re pickin' up good vibrations by discussing the best and worst songs this classic American rock band has given us during their five decades of making music. Kent thinks Brian Wilson is a genius. Zack says he loves The Beach Boys, but does he really? And Joel must draw a line in the sand about Kokomo.

Tell the teacher we’re surfin’, tell your dad we’re finally talking about one of his favorite bands, then press play!

And go to Baconsale.com for the Spotify playlist of Beach Boys music we talked about on this episode that we told you we’d give you.

Come on down! You’re the next listener on the Baconsale podcast! On this episode, we’re talking about game shows, old and new, and the survey says Kent, Joel, and Zack will have a great time doing it. We’re picking answers for 15 different categories, such as Best Host, Most Recognizable Theme Song, Show You Think You’d Do Well On, and Needs a Comeback. Plus, Joel & Kent try to win fabulous prizes while taking a trivia quiz that reveals who is the weakest link.

Press play, then phone a friend and tell them to listen as well.

Water. Earth. Fire. Air. Long ago, the four members of Baconsale lived in ignorance of a popular Nickelodeon TV series. Then, everything changed when Joel’s coworkers suggested he watch it. Only Joel watched Avatar: The Last Airbender at first, then he recommended it to Kent and it began to spread. But when the world needed this show the most, it vanished from streaming services. A few years passed, and Avatar has now returned to Netflix, and we have a superfan named Kris joining us to talk about it. And although our desire to discuss the whole series is great, we’re going to stick to the basics in order to appeal to everyone. But we believe that The Last Airbender can save the world.

Don’t let the animation style scare you away. Press play!

Gooooooooood morning, listener! There are many war movies out there. So many. Too many to choose from, in fact, so we’ve strategically narrowed down the field a bit. On this episode of Baconsale, Kent and Joel are each selecting four war films that don’t deal with the World Wars to put on their personal monument, following which we’ll decide which ones we’d carve in stone to create a public monument. From the Persian invasion of Greece to modern-day Afghanistan (but skipping over the years 1914 through 1945), we’re discussing some of the best battles the silver screen has to offer.

Are you not entertained? Wait, you’re not? Well, then, press play.

Kent hoped. Kent dreamed. Kent retweeted. And finally, this DC fanboy’s dream has come true, because Zack Snyder’s Justice League is coming to the small screen! HBO Max is releasing the Snyder Cut next year, 2021, and Kent could not be happier. Well, he would have been a little happier if Henry Cavill had announced Man of Steel 2, but he’s still pretty thrilled, and he wants to spread his warm fuzzy feelings to you, the listener.

Press play to hear Kent squee with geeky delight!

Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, select, start. There. Now you have 30 lives to listen to this episode of Baconsale! Today we’re taking things back to our childhood, when we would spend hours playing video games on the original Nintendo Entertainment System on our big 22-inch screen TVs. We’ve picked a dozen categories such as Doesn’t Hold Up, Deserves a Reboot, Best Box Art, and Most Frustrating Boss, and Kent & Joel are ready to choose their NES answers for each one.

It's dangerous to go alone! Press play to take this episode.

We’re not quite sure how Kent talked us into doing this, but for this BaconBit we’re reviewing the 2020 remake of a 1997 PlayStation game that was the seventh installment in the series. Kent was very passionate about Final Fantasy 7 back then, and he seems to share the same passion now—even though the new remake changes some things that fans of the franchise may not be happy with. Join us as we do our best to not make Kent cry, because he did back in ’97 when he played FF7.

Oh, and just in case you were worried, we’re not spoiling anything for the first part of this review, so go ahead and press play.

Have you ever enjoyed a movie that you never wanted to watch again? Kent, Joel, and Zack have! Whether it be because they were too long, too dark, too experimental, or too perfect, we’re talking about films that we’re glad we saw, but don’t have a desire to revisit. We’ll do our best to keep things light and fluffy, despite the grim subject matter we encounter along the way. Listen as Kent fears for Joel's hipster soul, while Zack makes some picks that are sure to be controversial for both children & adults.

Press play to decide how many times you’d like to listen to this episode of Baconsale.

Imagine Kent and Joel are on a school field, with a bunch of bad animated feature films standing in front of them. They must choose their team, one by one, and then present their final list to Zack, who has to decide which group of movies he’ll be watching for the rest of his life. That’s the premise of this episode. Watch as we try to defend mediocre-to-terrible children’s cartoons that you, the listener, gave to us. It ain’t pretty, but it’s Baconsale.

Don’t get left on the bench, press play!